I miss the family I remember from my childhood. Holidays in Rankin, TX...big Thanksgiving dinners, adults at the big table, kids at the fold out round tables in the living room...I miss watching classic Christmas shows in my gramas living room, either on the couch with all my cousins or laying on the floor on a pallet made of as many blankets and pillows as we could find...I miss eating dinner at my aunt Kathy's house on the hill and making videos with my cousins putting on "shows" for the adults...I miss summers in Rankin, walking to the pool every single day, so much so that my dyed blonde hair picked up a green tint from the mixing of chemicals....I miss "the land", a plot of land not far down the road from my grandparents house where we ran wild, family gatherings, BBQ's, we swam, fed chickens, popped fireworks, found snakes, hunted snipes, drove 4 wheelers, raised peacocks, emus, pigs, fish...I miss waking up early with my grandpa to feed the fish who could feel the vibrations of his duely truck and could be seen flipping at the top of the water in anticipation.... I miss holidays at my grama and grandpa Tolands house...I miss sitting in the TV room with them, two chairs, one on the left, one on the right side of the room toward the back for each grandparent...I miss making ice cream soup with my grama who had a deep freeze full of frozen sweets just for the grandchildren, mainly my cousins Missy, Robert, me and my brother ...we made trash bag slip n slides in the back yard and swang on the big swing under the huge shade trees....I miss the smell of my grama and the sound of my grampa Mac calling my grama "Slim"...I miss my brother when we were little, when he absolutely adored me, I miss the family trips we took to Carlsbad and the hotel we stayed at in San Angelo that had an indoor pool...I miss my family.
I miss my family the way it was way back when we were all younger and being together was just something we knew was going to happen.
Even though I miss the way my family was, I'm still so thankful for the family that is.
Maybe I just miss being young.

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