I know I’m not the only one that does this stuff so don’t judge me!

Weird stuff everybody does….Right?

  • Thinking about jerking the wheel while driving….for no reason.
  • Having or continuing a conversation or argument alone. (I do this in the car all the time, I’m usually talking shit to someone…and by someone I mean no one since it’s just me in the car)
  • Brushing your teeth before a dentist appointment.  Isn’t that their job?
  • Counting the hours you have left to sleep when you’ve stayed up way past your bed time.  “Let’s see, it’s one o’clock now so if I go to bed and fall right to sleep I’ll get… two, three, four, five, six, six and half hours of sleep!”
  • Feeling embarrassed in a public restroom when someone else walks in… like why should I be embarrassed about doing exactly what this facility is made for?
  • Scratching your head obsessively when you’re thinking a lot about something, worried about something or just really tired….ok that one’s just a thing I do but I wanted to throw it in there just to see if there’s a tiny possibility that I’m not the only who does it…. It’s kind of like an emotional tell, so if we’re ever hanging out and you see me scratching my head you’ll know why.
  • Buying something for a holiday like Christmas or a birthday way ahead of time and then completely forgetting either where you put it or that you bought it at all.
  • Hearing a noise in the house and imagining a hypothetical scenario where someone breaks in and you ninja the shit out them and save the day and give interviews on the local news about how you “just did what anyone else in that situation would do…” (again, this may just be something I do)
  • Googled crime scene photos….. ok, this list is starting to just be me confessing to being a total nut so I’m gonna go head and stop it right here.