Guys, I think I done messed up. I didn't know about the salmonella thing and I ate a damn goldfish yesterday...On an unrelated note, Looking at this picture, I just realize that goldfish kinda look like a tiddy with an implant scar underneath it. Is it weird that I'm now slightly turned on by a children's snack?

I ate a bag of goldfish and was severely disappointed in the taste...or should I say lack of taste. They used to be awesome. Now they have almost no flavor at all. I couldn't taste even a hint of cheese. It was more like chewing on a smiling piece of salted cardboard. When did this happen? I haven't eaten these in ages so I'm not quite sure when the makers decided that good taste wasn't the flavor they were going for.

I posted about this on Facebook and instantly got swarmed with people who apparently don't know how to read any 1 of  the 90 previous comments informing me that Goldfish are being massively recalled as well as a ton of other foods. It's too late for me guys. I'm a gonner but you can still save yourself. Here's a list of things that you should be able to put in your face but can't.

  • Goldfish Flavor Blasted Xtra Cheddar
  • Goldfish Flavor Blasted Sour Cream & Onion
  • Goldfish Baked with Whole Grain Xtra Cheddar
  • Goldfish Mix X-tra Cheddar Pretzel
  • Mrs. Freshleys Swiss Rolls
  • Food Lion Swiss Rolls
  • HEB Swiss Rolls
  • Baker’s Treat Swiss Rolls
  • Market Square Swiss Rolls
  • Great Value Swiss Rolls
  • Captain John Dersts Old Fashioned Bread
  • Ritz Bits Cheese
  • Ritz Cheese Cracker Sandwiches
  • Ritz Bacon Cracker Sandwiches with Cheese
  • Ritz Whole Wheat Cracker Sandwiches with White Cheddar Cheese
  • Ritz Everything Cracker Sandwiches with Cream Cheese
  • Mixed Cookie Cracker Variety 20 Pack
  • Hungry Man Bbq Sauced Boneless Chicken Wyngz